Mother of Two

Okay, so my last post might have been a little melodramatic (or "desperate sounding" as Jacob said.)  While I am still in awe of just how HARD it is to be responsible for two little lives, I'm pretty pleased with how my first week home alone with Jack and Cora has gone.

In all honesty, there were moments where the word drudgery was coming to mind.  Another poopy butt to wipe, diapers needing washing/drying/folding, time to pick up another room, the monumental effort required to get going somewhere...  But I got a healthy dose of perspective this week when I remembered that parenting is all about shepherding children from tiny babies to happy, productive adults and that all stages will be brief.  This thought helped me remember that it would be smarter to focus on what I like about each phase rather than being overwhelmed by the harder aspects as I know I will miss each phase once it's past.

And there have been so many wonderful moments this week.  Cora still sleeps a good bit, so I've gotten to spend a lot of quality time with Jack, which has been really special.  We've had several breakthroughs.  First, he's pooping in the potty!!  After months of trying to get him to do this, something clicked last weekend and now he's going on his own initiative.  (And I mean the child is going!  4, 6, 9 times a day - no lie!)  Second, after meltdowns when it was time to go home on our first two outings out, I started talking to him about how important it is for him to be willing to go when Mommy says it is time, how this is part of being kind to Mommy and helping her.  We talked about how the right response is to say "okay, Mommy" and by golly the child did this on Friday when we left the Parenting Center.  It was surreal!  It's been followed by an "okay Daddy" departure and we are hoping to hear it a lot more!

We've fallen into a nice routine this week during the day.  Jacob has been getting up with Jack so that Cora and I can sleep in a little longer.  After I feed Cora, little J and little C and I pile into the double BOB and go on a walk/errand.  Jack brings a breakfast snack and a book and when those are gone, we play I Spy.

A wide load

Once home, Jack then plays while I eat breakfast.  Then we spend an astonishingly long chunk of time working to get all of us ready and Cora fed again.  Every day at this point, we went somewhere (doctor's apptmt., Parenting Center, library) so that Jack could have a change of scenery and some fun.  We come home for lunch for all of us and then I put Jack down for his nap (50% success rate).  I then straighten up from the disaster of the night before (dirty diapers and clothes dropped by the bed).  I got a nap one day, but Cora tends to want me during Jack's nap/quiet time.  After nap/quiet time, Jack and I have been dancing/reading/puzzling/coloring (except for the one day I was pretty much passed out on the couch and he just destroyed the house around me).

During my "nap", I especially like the basket on the side table

Jacob's been trying to get home at a reasonable time and we've gotten to share Cora with friends who have dropped by after work. After dinner and Jack's bedtime routine, I start prepping for the night ahead (diapers and extra clothes by the bed, dirty diapers in the wash, get ready for bed) before Cora wants to eat so that I am ready for bed right when she is.

Evening Routine: that blue ball is a small child having tummy time while Daddy does homework

Night time is another post, but with 3 or 4 nighttime feedings, I am pretty worn down!  I don't really remember this part when I think about Jack as a baby, so I know she'll be able to stretch it out soon, so I'm just hanging in there for now.

On a positive note, all that eating has her plumping right up!

I'm proud of how well Jacob and I have teamed up to support each other this week and I'm so thankful to our wonderful friends who have been bringing us dinner!  That was really helpful in making this week manageable!

Some sweet shots:

Jack digging

Cora awake

If I'm being honest...

My mom left 2 hours ago.  It's amazing how motherhood can reduce someone who once considered herself quite accomplished to a pretty anxious and overwhelmed state.  I don't know that anything I've ever had in front of me daunted me quite as much as being on my own this week with two little children.  Not speaking in front of thousands of people, running a marathon in 80 degree heat, walking in to teach a class of 20 2nd graders on 5 weeks training, or anything else I've done.  Is that melodramatic?  I don't think so.  I'm schooled enough in this motherhood field to know that this week is going to kick my butt, so maybe I'm just smart to be nervous :)

Case in point.  In 2 hours of being on my own, Cora cried without ceasing on the drive home from the airport, while Jack screamed "Go back and pick up Grammy" and then wet his pants and carseat.  Once home, he has since pooped twice in the potty (a good thing) which as a new and novel thing kept me by his side while Cora continued to cry.  On the positive side, I did feed all of us and Cora is now asleep and Jack hopefully is falling asleep.

As with most things, I think if you can prepare well for a job/task/goal, then you can probably knock it out of the park.  The thing with motherhood is that you always seem to be working in subprime conditions.  I'm now going on two weeks of sleeping in 1.5 - 2.5 hour chunks, so I'd have to say I'm not at optimal performance levels.  I also got slammed with some mastitis and a double dose of pink eye, so again, not optimal.

Post afternoon naps

Enough with the complaining, I have two healthy children and I'm determined that this week will go well.  I want simply to keep everyone safe, fed, and feeling loved and to not lose my cool.  Simple goals, right?  Wish me luck!

(P.S.  Jack is definitely not napping, alas.)

The First Week

June 17, 2012

First off, Happy Father's Day to our favorite daddy!  Your babies love you and I am so happy we are in this parenting thing together!!

Cora's first week has passed quickly.  She.is.so.precious!  I could just sit and hold her all day.  She literally only sleeps and eats.  We are still waiting for her to really wake up.  She sleeps until it's time to eat and then she falls asleep while she is eating.  Changing her diaper is used to wake her up to eat/finish eating.  She seems to have a handful of awake times besides this pattern where we get to see her dark blue eyes as she stares wide eyed around at her world.  Almost all her pictures thus far are of her sleeping because that truly is all she does!

Cora during a rare awake moment

Jack on the other hand is operating at a Jack Landry Level 10.   He is high energy and enjoying the onslaught of attention from grandmothers, grandfathers, and aunts.  He loves visitors and will ask them to read him a book before too long.  My mom has been INVALUABLE this week getting up with Jack in the morning, feeding us all meals, doing laundry, taking Jack places, and keeping him entertained.  He actually napped every day but one, so that has been a blessing and hopefully one that will continue when Grammy leaves...???


Just a note - I love that Jack loves to read.  Who wouldn't love this trait?  But now there are others who understand how you can actually get tired of reading.  "Grammy, I want to read 4 books...Grammy, do you want to read this book?....Grammy, can we read a nummy book?"  He would read 100 books a day if he had willing adults.  My mom and I both laughed when my dad arrived and Jack said, "Big Papa will you read me this book?" and Big Papa good naturedly said "Sure Jack".  "Fresh meat" we were thinking.  We'll see how many books it takes before Big Papa also starts negotiating the act of reading.  (Seriously though, I'm so glad Jack loves to sit quietly and listen to stories and that he loves books so much, I think it's more the need to have constant entertainment that is tiring!)

He also likes to play in the dirt, so he loved continuing to help with the landscaping projects:

Here's a look at what Cora has been up to during her first week

Cora's Birth Story

Cora Beth Landry

June 9, 2012 

7 lbs., 11 oz. - 20 in.

Here is Cora's birth story, with all the details.  If you're interested in a quick summary:

- NOT fun and REALLY painful, while at the same time ideally quick

- perfect timing

- beautiful, healthy baby

The Story.

Friday, June 8th was a perfect day.  I was about to be 38 weeks.  I'd worked all week and took Friday to be at home with Jack.  We didn't have any reason to rush, so we went on a walk, to the bakery, and then took our breakfast to "my park" as Jack calls it and took our time playing.  Then we went home, arriving minutes before a major rainstorm.  Later in the morning, we went to the Parenting Center where we happened upon "water day" and Jack got to strip down to his undies and play in the sprinkler/pool they had set up.  It was such a leisurely morning and special quality time.   And then Jack actually napped!  This allowed me to spend several hours wrapping up things for my job and finishing some random to-dos.  To then have Cora born the next morning - how perfect it was to spend such a special last Mommy-Jack day AND feel so on top of preparing for baby AND not have to go all the way to my due date!

In the morning, I'd had my normal contractions, but after lunch I felt like maybe the day's contractions were a little more frequent and slightly more uncomfortable than they had been.  After having literally thousands of contractions in the last several months, I didn't think too much of it, but while Jack was napping I started writing down when I was having them to see if they were regular.  They weren't all that regular (10-20 mins) but they lasted all afternoon no matter if I was up and doing things or sitting, which made me wonder, since my contractions up to that point had always stopped being consistent after a few hours.

We had dinner plans but since I felt fine, I decided we should still go out and just see if the contractions kept up.  We went to Jacob's NORLI graduation dinner and I continued to feel fine but the contractions continued.  They were closer to 10 minutes apart at this point and the few I paid attention to were about 30 seconds.

After we got home, I decided to time them for 30 minutes to see what was up and they were lasting about a minute and were 9-10 minutes apart.  This made me think it could actually be early labor, so I texted my friend Toy to give her a heads up that this could be the night we dropped Jack off at their house!

It took me a while to go to sleep because I was keyed up (and I drank tea for dinner - mistake).  I noticed contractions occasionally but they weren't really painful and didn't seem regular, but I was also dozing, so it's hard to say.  I got up several times to pee and by 2:00 I had probably only slept 2 hrs. and I had heartburn so I just sat up in bed.  This woke Jacob up, and so I said let's time contractions.  It took a while for me to have one, but when I did, it was strong.  I said, I won't be able to sleep through them, so I'm going to get up.  I called my parents to give them a heads up since my mom wasn't planning to come till Tuesday.

I got out of bed around 2:45 to take a shower.  The contractions immediately picked up and within 15 minutes, they had gone from 5 to 3 minutes apart.  At this point, I started needing a coping mechanism, so I would drop to the floor on my hands and knees and started kicking the ground with my feet and counting my breaths to get through the contraction.  (I also managed to put my make-up on during this to Jacob's "Really?")

My hair was wet so I thought I'd blow dry my hair but as I started to do this (on the ground) I started feeling lots of pressure and had a monster contraction, so I put vanity aside and started giving commands to Jacob to hurry us out of the house.  He finished packing, loaded the car, called the midwives and Toy and got Jack up.  We locked the door at 3:49 a.m. after I had one more hands and knees contraction on the ground.

Jack took getting up this early in stride and was excited to go to his friend "other Jack's" house.  He said "can I take a nap there?"  I had two contractions on the short drive to Toy's house, but managed to just breathe through them looking forward so as not to scare Jack.

On the way to the hospital I had strong contractions at both 3:58 and 3:59, so I started to panic slightly about how many steps there still were to getting to the hospital.  We got to the parking garage at about 4:05.  I had one contraction as we parked and it seemed like the next one was just a minute later.  As we got off the elevators, Jacob grabbed a wheelchair which made navigating the under construction hospital at this point in labor much more manageable.  I made him stop when I had a contraction because they were so intense and it hurt more to be moving.

We rolled up to labor and delivery and Jacob did the talking while I huffed and puffed through another contraction.  We wanted to try a water birth, so he asked for their special "tub room".  Our male nurse (just saying this because even in the state I was in, I still had the thought that a MAN was going to see me in these next stages?!) ushered us in the room where I lost all modesty and hit the floor on the next contraction and started hollering.  Clothes got tossed in a pile in exchange for the hospital gown which quickly also got tossed in a pile.  The nurse attempted to check me which broke my water.  My midwife wasn't there yet, so the resident doctor checked me and I was completely dilated.

I felt like I wanted to push, so I got up on the bed, but then started saying "Someone tell me how, I don't remember how to push."  At this point, it is just Jacob, me and the nurse but the 2 deep breaths and then two held breaths/pushes approach came to me, so I started doing that on the next contraction.  My midwife came in right around then (I think this was about 4:25) and I was very happy to see her.

After the first push or so, I remembered "oh yeah, pushing will get this baby out and END this, so I should push hard!!"  So I closed my eyes and just started going for it, hoping it was working.  I got offered a mirror and to feel the baby's head, but I had no interest in this because I didn't want to be disappointed if we weren't making fast progress!  It became quite evident by the pain that the baby was coming and while the pauses between contractions at first were nice, they quickly became very uncomfortable with the head partly out!  My midwife was great about just telling me to go with what I was feeling and it didn't take too long because Cora was born at 4:38 a.m. (7 lbs, 11 oz and 20 in.)  There was such relief when her head came out and I knew to just give one more push because I remembered how quickly the rest of Jack came.

I said several "thank Gods" mainly because I was so glad she was out and not inside anymore and then I got to see her and everything switched from me being wrapped up in the pain to being so excited to meet my daughter!



I'm sure this blog will devote much space to Cora, but let's just say the last 24 hours have been awesome.  She is just a tiny (1 lb less than Jack makes her seem tiny to me) ball of preciousness and I am loving all this time to just hold and look at her.  I couldn't have been happier with how Jack's and Cora's meeting went and he has continued to ask to hold her and been interested in her.

I got my indoctrination to being mother to 2 a few short hours after Cora was born when Jacob brought Jack to the hospital (pre-arrival of grandmothers) and he pooped and peed in his big boy underwear.  Jacob was holding Cora, so I took over clean up duty.  No rest for the weary - I had a feeling!  (I am taking my full 2 night stay in the hospital though - real life will come soon enough and I'm resting up!)

*P.S.  Thank you to my coach, Jacob who calmly led us through a crazy morning and helped me bring our second beautiful baby into this world.

Here is our daughter:

Daddy and Cora

Big brother kisses

Grammy with her 2 grandchildren

First family of four shot

37 weeks

37 weeks pregnant (6/3/12)

Yeah!  37 weeks means this is a full term pregnancy.  I do realize what a blessing this is and I'm so glad Cora is getting her full time to grow and develop.

I've been nesting away and have had fun finishing up my baby to-do list.  Diapers are on the changing table, clothes are clean and in the closet, crib and cradle are ready, house is pretty clean.  Bring on baby!

Here is a check-in on my initial list:

To-Do List Before Baby

1) Jack's Room: Buy big boy furniture and move Jack from nursery to big boy bed in his room - Done! I still want to buy a new dresser and hang curtains, but that is a later project.

2) Nursery: Decorate nursery to welcome new baby - Done!  I love the finished project.  I also love that we finished it early because Jack and I go in there daily to rock and read in "Cora's room."

Cora's cradle in our room

3) Dining Room: Finish decorating - we need bar stools, at least one piece of furniture to sit on, and to hang pictures - Eh, we bought the stools and I'm happy with the room - I'm sure we'll do more here later.

4) Our bedroom: Find places for very large pile of stuff and turn this corner into a nursing/reading/relaxing nook with a glider + ottoman - Pile is gone and corner is empty; nursing/reading nook still seems like a great idea, but we couldn't buy everything at once.  Hopefully we'll get something for our room soon because I do like the idea of a place to nurse/read upstairs besides climbing up on a bed.

5) Porch: Clean off our porch and start using it - meaning buy some porch furniture - Yes!  The porch was stained and we bought furniture.  We will ultimately move the swing into the yard, but I love that we have a place to relax.  Too bad it's SO HOT in this city.
 

6) Backyard: Test our backyard for lead, remediate if need be, landscape, possibly put up a back fence, and make it a place that will be fun for Jack to play outside this summer. - Tested and yes we have lead.  Jacob did some serious excavating on our future play area and we dropped some serious change on dirt (seriously - did you know dirt is expensive?!)  Today's project was spreading out the new dirt in our side yard and porch beds and then next weekend we are getting sod delivered.  That just leaves purchasing a swing set and then Jack will have an awesome spot to play! 

Jack liked being Daddy's little helper and he was in HEAVEN with dirt we'd actually let him play with

What a messy activity!  After lunch he got an outside bath.

 (Oh yeah, we also are the "parents" of 6 chickens now!  Isn't the coop cute?)

7) Baby Supplies: We only NEED new cloth diapers, upgraded changing table, a toilet bowl sprayer, a double stroller, and some girl clothes. - Done!  All purchased, cleaned, and ready!

Week Thirty-Seven Stats:

How it feels to be pregnant at 37 weeks: My contractions are becoming stronger and longer but still irregular.  Labor's onset definitely doesn't seem far off at this point.  I am proud to say that Jack and I were out for several hours yesterday: on a walk, at the park, at the farmer's market, and at a library party and I realized how fortunate I am to feel as good as I do at this point!  My main complaint is my back and that's only at times.

Belly Comparisons

37 weeks with Cora

37 weeks with Jack

My healthy pregnancy intentions for last week (how I did): 

1) Midwife appointment on Wednesday where I'll get an exam to see if these contractions are actually doing anything (We're moving in the right direction.  70% effaced and 1-2 centimeters dilated!  I was 2 cm dilated with Jack at 37 weeks, so this puts me progressing at the same rate as last time (and he was born 8 days early) so I'll take it!

2) Checking off lots of final things on baby to do list (washing bedding and diapers, finishing Cora's room, etc.) (Yes - I really don't have that much more to do and there are lots of cute clean girl clothes hanging up!)

3) Keep walking daily even though I'm starting to feel more tired/winded overall (For the first time this week, I took two days off in a row because it is just SO HOT and with the more intense contractions, walking did NOT sound appealing.  We were back out yesterday though and I foresee continue to walk until the baby comes.)

4) Bradley exercises + relaxation practice (I did not do well on this one - why am I slacking off now?!)

My healthy pregnancy intentions for this week:

1) Midwife appointment on Wednesday

2) I really want to still be pregnant on Tuesday night so I can hold the first La Leche League of New Orleans meeting (7:00 at ZukaBaby).  I'm hoping for a good turn out and have everything ready to go, just need Cora to stay in until at least then!

3) Eat healthily, take walks, and go to prenatal yoga.

4) I'm still working this week and do have some final things to finish up (on work/personal to do lists) but I want to purposely take time to rest and relax since that is equally important!

5) Review Bradley book and get back up to 4 days of Bradley exercises.

Jack at 2.5 years

Piercingly precious,

Completely irrational,

Jack: 2 and a half

Those are his two sides for sure!  What is most precious about him lately?

• His speech patterns: lots of intonation and ending sentences on a high note
• The way he now knows/shows remorse and will apologize for things and give you unprompted kisses to "make it better" (i.e. after he doesn't listen or scratches you)
• His memory - it's pretty good so don't tell him anything you don't intend to do!
• The way he says "You will be so proud of me?" when he talks about pooping, being good, being kind, etc.
• The way he says "That will be a good idea?" :)
• How he randomly reached for me one day and pulled my face in for a kiss - melt my heart!
• His voracious book appetite - we read and read and read over here.  He loves 70 page books like The Cat in the Hat, loves/loves/loves Curious George, and is slowly getting over a Cinderella fetish.
• His recognition of good/evil and the way he looks to label characters in the books he reads.  Stepsisters: not nice/Cinderella: nice, Queen: evil/Snow White: nice

And the completely irrational side?  That's an easy one to write about at this particular moment as he is crying hysterically at 3:00 because I gave him exactly what he asked for when presented with two options: bops in his bed for nap or read books, no bops.  He changed his mind over and over and after crying hysterically when I took away the bops THAT HE WILLINGLY HANDED ME, he is now crying hysterically because he has his bops but is supposed to be in his bed napping.

• I'm 100% convinced that he still NEEDS a nap, but he mostly refuses to TAKE one.  As my mom affirms, you can't MAKE a child take a nap, and do believe me I've tried.  The afternoons can be long with a grumpy, disagreeable 2 year old.
• He is 95% potty trained for #1 but will not go poopy in the potty even though he has done it before.  We are several months into this, so I'm starting to lose hope it's going to change anytime soon.  He had no accidents on a 15 hour car trip to SC, peeing in the toilet every 1 1/2-2 hrs when we'd stop, and he'll go put himself on the toilet to pee, but he will hold his poop until he has a pull-up on for school or a diaper on for bedtime.  We have very cool incentives for pooping which he'll tell you about excitedly but he'll also ask for a diaper so he can poop.  When asked why he won't poop in the potty ... "tuz I don't want to".
• On that note, that is his reason for most things "tuz I DON'T want to" or "tuz I DO want to", emphasis Jack's
• He has become increasingly attached to his pacifiers (bops).  This is not a battle I feel is worth fighting right now as he basically only has them for sleeping, the baby is about to be here, and she most likely will get to have them.  On the other hand, it's no fun going through bop separation in the morning and post nap.  Of course there are times, he happily and willingly hands them over, but the irrational, meltdowns are more common.

Here's some cuteness:


Shots from a Saturday in Jack-land

36+ weeks

36+ weeks pregnant (5/29/12)

This weekend we took a quick trip to Gulfport, MS to spend a little time as a family of 3 before the big switch to a family of 4 comes.  I am SO GLAD that we did this.  At the very least, I'll have a helpful way of remembering some of the last moments where I was primarily mother to 1 child, rather than 2.  Plus I think it's good for us to just get away in order to really all focus on each other (rather than the yard, the house, our many projects, etc.)  I'm hoping there is another beach trip in our future this summer.

It wasn't a glamorous trip, but it was perfect for Jack.  It was only a short drive, there was a fun children's museum, our hotel was across the street from the beach and had a pool, and the ocean was essentially a big tidal pool which was a great set-up for Jack to play in the water.

The downsides to the trip were that 1) Jack got sick at night but managed to perk up for more morning fun in the beach and pool and 2) we got unknown emergency warning lights in our car both on the way there and back that resulted in a 2.5 hr pit stop at the New Orleans Toyota dealership on the way home.  Jack was sick enough to be docile during this stop, but 2.5 hours for a 2.5 year old is a LITTLE long!

I'm glad we got to fully focus on Jack for one more trip.  There are definitely some things I'll miss about being a mom of one, like:

• having such simple priorities when my child is sick or needs me - everything else has been able to take a back seat when Jack has been sick (from big sicknesses to small) and I can imagine it won't be quite that simple when everything else includes an equally loved child
• no competitions for snuggle time - Jack likes to snuggle and we have spent LOTS of time curled up together/rocking together/me holding him in the last 2.5 years.  I may have just carried all 35 lbs of him all wrapped up in a towel all the way from the pool to our room (+25 lbs of baby) just bc I wanted to relish him being my baby a little longer.
• the mom/child buddy system - we are definitely best pals and have had lots of special adventures just the two of us
• how easy it is to stretch out and enjoy the various routines of the day because I only have one child that needs me at those times (Jacob has the maturity and patience, usually, to wait)

But I know we are exchanging one special set-up for another and I can't wait for me and Jack to get to know Cora together and to just add more love to our family.

Jack's Memorial Day Trip video

Week Thirty-Six Stats:

How it feels to be pregnant at 36 weeks: My back gets really stiff when I stand for more than a minute or so or when I'm sleeping.  I get a shooting pain when I move after either of those things.  I'm having more contractions this week, but they are still irregular.

My healthy pregnancy intentions for last week (how I did): 


1) Midwife appointment on Tuesday (went well - Jacob and I talked through our birth plan and I really appreciated the time our midwife Esther spent with us as well as the advice she had to give)

2) Eat healthy, go to prenatal yoga, and do Bradley exercises 4 times (There were a few chocolate croissants and some guilty pleasures on our trip, but otherwise...., yes, 3x)

3) Continue deep cleaning my house to satisfy my nesting instinct and so I can bring baby home to a dust free house! (yes!)

My healthy pregnancy intentions for this week:

1) Midwife appointment on Wednesday where I'll get an exam to see if these contractions are actually doing anything

2) Checking off lots of final things on baby to do list (washing bedding and diapers, finishing Cora's room, etc.)

3) Keep walking daily even though I'm starting to feel more tired/winded overall

4) Bradley exercises + relaxation practice

35 weeks

35 weeks pregnant - 5/21/12

Okay, now I finally feel like Cora's arrival is getting close.  I think she'll be here in about 4 weeks and when I think back 4 weeks (just as we left for our trip), I realize that is NOT that much time!

This week was pretty difficult.  After five months of being well, Jack came down with 3 different sicknesses: an ongoing cold that we think is actually a sinus infection, some type of virus that gave him ulcers, and a stomach bug.  We started the week with the first two and the bug hit on Wednesday, though it took me until Thursday to think his Wednesday upchuck wasn't just a fluke.  I had to juggle a busy week at work with a child who couldn't go to school and a husband who was out of town for a night.  Somehow, it actually all went really well and Jack and I had some very special 1:1 time this week.

I got a big surprise on Saturday when the doorbell rings and my MOM is standing outside...with my sister Kristen in the driveway!  (Both live in SC.) I feel like I'm a hard person to surprise, but the two of them + Jacob completely kept this visit from me and it was such a great surprise.  I abandoned my boring weekend plans of cleaning and we went out to lunch and then they babysat Jack while Jacob and I went out on Saturday night (combination of porch furniture shopping and dinner at Tamarind).

On Sunday we went to breakfast and then Jacob and I went to church.  When we get home, Jack and mom/sister are gone, but I assume they are at the park.  Then they pull up...with my sister Claire in the car!  Claire who lives in Jackson, WY (but happened to be in SC this week).  Double surprise for me!  Mom, Claire, and Kristen all came to go to my baby shower.

So to cap off a great weekend, I had a baby shower on Sunday afternoon.  Nash Crewes, Maya McLaughlin, Emily Steffan, and Julia Dezen: thank you for such a nice afternoon!  Cora's closet has a lot more pink in it now and Jack is temporarily adopting 4 new "friends", the giraffe, doll, elephant, and kitty cat that Cora got as gifts.  (Seriously, he calls them "his friends" and took all 4 (PINK) stuffed animals to the park with him yesterday - I may have made them ride in a plastic  bag :) )

Week Thirty-Five Stats:

How it feels to be pregnant at 35 weeks:I can't figure it out but as soon as I lay down, I am SO uncomfortable.  Every position seems to make my back seize.  During the day I feel pretty good unless I stand for a long time and then my back hurts.  I just ignore the contractions now, but still have them every day.

My healthy pregnancy intentions for last week (how I did): 

1) Be healthy!  Eat well, go to prenatal yoga, gym, and do my Bradley exercises 4 times this week. (Um, no, no, and almost - I drank a lot of (homemade) strawberry lemonade this week, ate okay, chose deep cleaning my kitchen over going to prenatal yoga, didn't make it to the gym, and did an okay job with the Bradley exercises)

2) Finish Bradley book and do at least one relaxation practice with Jacob. (yes and no)

3) Focus on being in the present even as I'm working a serious to-do list at work and for baby - I know this is a special time and I don't want to squander it focusing too much on getting ready. (Yes!  This was a surprising achievement bc this week did not go as expected with Jack sick, but the time home with him really helped me slow down and pay attention to how precious he can be - it made me look forward to the slower speed of my  maternity leave and summer in general!)

My healthy pregnancy intentions for this week:

1) Midwife appointment on Tuesday

2) Eat healthy, go to prenatal yoga, and do Bradley exercises 4 times

3) Continue deep cleaning my house to satisfy my nesting instinct and so I can bring baby home to a dust free house! 

35 week belly with Jack

35 week belly with Cora

Belly Comparisons!  I'm starting to think I'm about the same size this time with Jack

34 weeks

34 weeks pregnant - 5/13/12

In my very pregnant state with my very active 2 year old, I want to stop and give a shout out to all the mothers in the world.  It might take being a mother (or at least living with one, which btw encompasses pretty much everyone) to fully appreciate them.

I feel infinitely blessed to get to wear these shoes.  I have yet to have a day without overwhelming moments of love and gratitude for Jack.  I am now at the point in this pregnancy where I'm truly very excited to meet Cora and to get to watch her go from the point of brand new baby in my arms to inquisitive, talkative, independent child.

Just as good a Grammy as she is a Mom

It is also SUCH a DIFFICULT job.  I feel like this gets said a lot, but I wonder how much people really value this role.  Motherhood is such an awesome responsibility as you not only are entrusted with forming a human life, but also loving and molding as well as preparing that life for independence.  There is no "off duty".  Even if you are working or not with your child for whatever reason, you still are responsible for them and, hopefully, very much concerned with how they are acting/what they are learning/how they are being treated/whether they are safe/etc.

Grammy and Jack

I don't know how my mother raised 4 children.  FOUR!  I could possibly see a world where we have four kids, but I think two will be keeping me mighty busy for a while.  I want my children to have a happy childhood like I had.  There are many, many reasons why I can categorize my childhood as happy, but nearly all of those originate with my parents.  My mom exemplifies the role of motherhood and has willingly adapted to all the stages of parenting, continuing to be such a supportive, loving, and daily presence in my life now, even when I'm an "adult" and she lives 12 hours away.

So it is for these reasons and many others that our baby girl will be Cora Beth after my mom Beth Ann.  Now I hope I can be to her what my mom has been and is to me :)

Week Thirty-Four Stats:

How it feels to be pregnant at 34 weeks: Days are generally good except for my sore back; nights are uncomfortable; still have contractions every day, but I ignore them for the most part.  Have no idea how my belly will accommodate 2-3 more lbs of baby.  I have room in my upper abdomen, but I'm doubting the baby will "rise up" at this point in my pregnancy. 

My healthy pregnancy intentions for last week (how I did): 


1) Finish reading Bradley book and do Bradley exercises 4 days (Almost done and did exercises 3 days)

2)  Do Bradley relaxation exercises 2 times (1 time + prenatal yoga)

3) Midwife appointment on Tuesday (everything looks good and definitely know that Cora has her head WAY down,  is facing my left side with her little but on my right side, feet on left)

4) Try to make the return to cooking fun by coming up with 3 healthy meals (I can hardly remember - I think I bought hummus, made grilled cheese, and we grilled out 1 night; I did do a good job of eating lots of salads for lunch though)

My healthy pregnancy intentions for this week:

1) Be healthy!  Eat well, go to prenatal yoga, gym, and do my Bradley exercises 4 times this week.

2) Finish Bradley book and do at least one relaxation practice with Jacob.

3) Focus on being in the present even as I'm working a serious to-do list at work and for baby - I know this is a special time and I don't want to squander it focusing too much on getting ready.

33 weeks

33 weeks pregnant - 5/5/12

Top 5 reasons why parents should periodically go on trips without their children:

#5 - Your days won't revolve around anyone else's schedule/needs/whims but, instead, your own - how NOVEL!

How did we take advantage of this?  We went shopping, ate at nice restaurants at the time of day that appealed to us, went on walks without having to take a stroller, went on a hike, spent an entire day at a spa, read, went to a beer festival, listened to music, went Contra Dancing (!), and made impulse decisions.  It.Was.Awesome.

Me contra dancing at 32 weeks pregnant

#4 - Bedtime and waketimes can be determined by how tired you are rather than the particular sleep pattern of your child.

We got ample sleep though I would recommend also taking these trips outside of pregnancy bc a baby inside you can also determine your sleep patterns.  Cushiony, king size bed at the Hilton was comfortable enough for both Cora and I to forget our pregnant state, but double bed at our Victorian B&B was not as much a success.

#3 - You can eat leisurely at restaurants, have meaningful conversations with your partner, and if you get lonely for a child, you can just look at the tables that do have children and remember again why eating without children is so relaxing.

Jacob would have been fine with a 2 meal a day plan; Cora and I requested the full 3 meal plan and enjoyed it!


#2 - When your days aren't revolving around a little person, you can actually focus in on your partner and reconnect.  You find them cuter, nicer, funnier, and more interesting in this light :)

It's so easy to just want to hand off your child to the other parent at the end of a long day to get some much needed alone time OR to want to do things as a family, but that leaves quality time for just the two of you happening infrequently.  A few days alone with Jacob easily reminded me why we fell in love and how much he is my best friend.  

Post walk at Furman University, my alma mater

#1 - Everything wonderful about your child will still be there when you pick them up and take them home, but you'll be re-energized as a mother/father and more in sync as a couple/parenting team.

I was entirely convinced that it was healthy for us to take a trip before the big arrival of baby Cora.  Thank you to my parents for making it so easy for us to leave Jack.  He seriously had a blast and hardly missed us.  They also saved us from a sleepless night when Jack came down with a bad cold and my dad even got to run out to a 24 hour drugstore to get medicine - I'm sure they are enjoying their rest now!

Week Thirty-Three Stats:

How it feels to be pregnant at 33 weeks: My main complaint right now is that it is hard to sleep comfortably.  I'm so stiff when I wake up, especially in my back and I wake up a lot!  During the day, I'm still feeling good for the most part.  My back is definitely my main issue.  Still having about 20 contractions a day though I'm no longer counting them

My healthy pregnancy intentions for last week (how I did): 
 
 1) Finish reading Bradley book and do Bradley exercises 4 days (almost finished reading and did Bradley exercises some, but could have done more)

2) Do relaxation exercises 2 times (Does my massage count?  I went back to prenatal yoga this week and we did some relaxation there, but otherwise, still no.)

3) Finish making my plan on how to roll out first LLL meeting in June (Yes, now I need to distribute flyers and start spreading the word - June 5 at 7:00 at Zuka Baby for any locals that are interested)

4) Don't have the baby while on vacation :) (Check!)

My healthy pregnancy intentions for this week:

1) Finish reading Bradley book and do Bradley exercises 4 days

2)  Do Bradley relaxation exercises 2 times

3) Midwife appointment on Tuesday

4) Try to make the return to cooking fun by coming up with 3 healthy meals

32 weeks

 32 weeks pregnant - 4/29/12

32 weeks pregnant - from the front

I've come to the conclusion that most people don't have a good sense of what a woman looks like when she is nine months pregnant.  Even women who have had a baby seem to forget, especially if they are older.  I know this because I'm constantly being told "Any day now, right?" or being met with dropped jaws when I say I'm not due till mid-June.  (And let's be honest, I usually am vague and say "June" or lie and say "early June".)  It doesn't really bother me but when it happens over and over, I do get a little tired of it!  Though I do agree with these strangers, my belly looks huge to me too.

It has been SO NICE to be on vacation.  With my parents' help with Jack while we were at the beach, I didn't have to get up when he got up.  This allowed me to be lazy in the morning which is nice because I'm not sleeping great right now.  It was cool at the beach so it wasn't a traditional beach vacation, but Jack still got to play in the sand a lot and even ventured into what Jacob said was "freezing" water.

32 weeks pregnant - from the side

We are now on day 3 of our 5 day babymoon and so the relaxation continues.  Reading, sleeping, talking, walking, eating, being lazy/being productive, it's all easy to do when you are only on your own timetable.

Disclaimer: I have called/texted my mom no less than 15 times in the last 48 hours and this morning I almost cried because I miss Jack.  I am totally enjoying the time away but MISS my snuggly little firecracker.  He, on the other hand, is having a blast and doesn't seem to notice we are gone.

Week Thirty-Two Stats:

How it feels to be pregnant at 32 weeks: Pelvic pressure, contractions, back pain - one or more flare up making it hard to walk and then the next day, I feel totally fine.  So overall, still very manageable at this point.

My healthy pregnancy intentions for last week (how I did - it's amazing how unproductive I was this week, but that's what vacation is about, right?):


1) SLEEP! (yes though I can't seem to sleep past 6:30/7)

2) Finish reading my La Leche League Leader Handbook and plan how to roll out the new LLL of New Orleans group's first meeting in early June (started working on this)

3) Finish reading my Bradley book and do my Bradley exercises 4 days (didn't read but did do Bradley exercises some)

4) Do relaxation exercises 2 times (nope - see list below)


My healthy pregnancy intentions for this week:

1) Finish reading Bradley book and do Bradley exercises 4 days

2) Do relaxation exercises 2 times

3) Finish making my plan on how to roll out first LLL meeting in June

4) Don't have the baby while on vacation :)

31 weeks

31 weeks pregnant - 4/21/12

It still feels like baby Cora's arrival is a good ways off, but it is nice to see those weeks tick off! I feel like she's going to be a little early and my guess is in the teens of June (her due date is June 23). If I were going to bet, I'd put my money on the 17th. That is based on what I think is my true due date (probably around the 25th) + the fact that Jack was 8 days early. I'm writing this down just because I'm interested to see if she proves me totally wrong.

Did you know full term pregnancies are 38-42 weeks? That is a full school year. That is between 266-294 days. That is as long as we lived in Seattle. That is 1/3 of Jack's life. My point: that is a L-O-N-G stretch of time. Thankfully, I'm leaving on vacation! Since we all know vacations fly by, I figure I'll be 33 weeks before I know it and that's close enough to 38, for me to want time to pass slowly as I still have lots I want to get done.

You may have heard us talk about a trip to Puerto Rico. Jacob was itching to do a big trip before baby arrived, taking advantage of our ability to leave our one older child with grandparents and go somewhere a little adventurous. We looked at several countries, but Puerto Rico's flight options were the best. We booked the flights in January thinking I'd be 30-31 weeks. Then my due date moved up a week. Then I started having daily contractions. We waited until 2 weeks ago to make a decision but I don't think either of us were wanting to take the risk of being a flight away from home/Jack/work/family. So now we are going to drive to SC during Jacob's spring break and spend some time with my family at the beach. We are then leaving Jack with my parents for four nights and going to upstate SC/NC for some couple time.

I've really been looking forward to this trip and plan to enjoy every minute! Jack is going to have a blast at the beach and I want to enjoy the lazy beach days and then cram about every non-child friendly activity into our four days away (like spa visit, nice dinners, reading, sleeping, movies, music, coffee shops, impulse decisions, adult conversation, etc.)

Now we just have to survive the 14 hour car trip!

Pregnant with baby Cora - 31 weeks

Week Thirty-One Stats:

How it feels to be pregnant at 31 weeks: I'm having lots of pelvic pressure because of baby Cora's position + a sore back if I stand too long + a sore butt if I sit too long. Other than that, I feel pretty good and have been going on daily walks.

My healthy pregnancy intentions for last week (how I did):

1) Midwifery appointment on Wednesday (went well - saw new part time midwife who also commented on how low baby is {not that I'm not fully aware of this!}

2) Keep reading Bradley book and do Bradley exercises 4 days this week (did this)

3) Do one practice relaxation exercise with Jacob from Bradley book (did NOT do this and need to as I know this is something that takes practicing before it's a skill I'll be able to pull out during labor)

4) Finish up the requirements of my La Leche League Leader certification (yes! I'll start a group in June)

My healthy pregnancy intentions for this week:

1) SLEEP!

2) Finish reading my La Leche League Leader Handbook and plan how to roll out the new LLL of New Orleans group's first meeting in early June

3) Finish reading my Bradley book and do my Bradley exercises 4 days

4) Do relaxation exercises 2 times

30 weeks

30 weeks pregnant (4/15/12)

Jacob and I believe in preparing for and having as natural a childbirth as possible. Because this is our belief and our goal, I thought I'd break down why.

As it is with most young couples, there was a time when we didn't know much about birth or have any opinions. We were getting closer to wanting a baby and found ourselves watching The Business of Being Born one night when we lived in Seattle. The documentary explores the history of birth, specifically in America, and raises some very valid questions: i.e. why are our Cesarean rates so high and why has birth in our country changed so much in the last 50-100 years? The underlying premise of the documentary is that birth has become, unnecessarily and not to our advantage, overmedicalized.

When we were pregnant with Jack, this movie plus some subsequent reading on my part led us to the Bradley Method childbirth classes. The Bradley Method, also called Husband Coached Childbirth, espouses viewing pregnancy and birth as normal events (not sicknesses or illnesses to treat), the importance of good nutrition and exercise during pregnancy, and using relaxation and coaching during labor as opposed to medications for pain relief, and the primacy of the woman and the husband as the key players during a birth.

We went to 12 classes, read Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way, and entered my labor intellectually prepared for a non-medicated birth. We felt strongly that this was the best choice for us and this conviction and mindset is what I attribute to my successful natural childbirth. My labor with Jack was long (27 hours) and pretty hard the last 5 hours or so. At some point on the afternoon of December 3, 2009, I was no longer thinking clearly, but I had Jacob with me throughout to keep me focused and doing the things we learned help bring a baby along (walking, changing positions, trying to relax, etc.) We also had clearly communicated our birth plan and our desire to have a natural childbirth to the hospital/nurses and they all were supportive as well. I specifically remember my third labor nurse arriving a little after 7pm (Jack was born at 8:38pm) and I remember begging her to help me and she just kept telling me to listen to Jacob and what he was telling me to do, which in hindsight I very much appreciate her honoring our wishes.

I want to have a second natural childbirth for 3 reasons. First, I believe that birth is a normal event and that the body has an amazing process in place to bring a baby into the world. I think that once you start altering that process (with any of a long list of possible interventions), then you are actually getting in your own way and hindering the body's ability to bring out the baby in the most efficient and least painful way. Second, I think that an unmedicated birth positions both the mother and the baby to be in the best possible places to bond, start breastfeeding, and just to in general start motherhood after the birth. Lastly, I found it to be an empowering experience and something I feel really good about.

In the effort of full disclosure, let me be clear that I don't think I handled my first birth gracefully AT ALL! I repeatedly was asking to die (in all seriousness), along with begging for all kinds of help. I don't think I was particularly brave and I give a lot of credit to Jacob for making sure we didn't veer way off of our plan. My goal this time is to not fight the contractions because I think that makes them more painful (tensing up as opposed to relaxing). I also think I'll be going in with more perspective since the scariest thing last time was that I didn't know how the whole experience was going to play out and I couldn't imagine the pain ending. This time I know that labor does lead to a birth and the pain pretty much goes away instantaneously when the baby is born. I also think I've had some life experiences that will make me be braver and I hope that I will remember those during this birth.

Now I know you get THIS at the end!!

I will definitely let you know how it all turns out! In the meantime, I do highly recommend the Bradley Method courses as they really do educate you and your partner A LOT about the whole spectrum of pregnancy, birth, and early parenting!

Week Thirty Stats:

How it feels to be pregnant at 30 weeks: Feeling pretty good still - backache has not come back; have leveled off to about 20 contractions a day, so they are not too disruptive. I did feel pretty tired this week, but I also ran out of iron pills, so hopefully now that I'm back on them, I won't feel so wiped out.

My healthy pregnancy intentions for last week (how I did):

1) Do all 4 Bradley exercises three days this week (Yes!)

2) Read four chapters in Bradley book and continue reading Ina May's Guide to Childbirth (Yes!)

3) Cook 4 healthy meals for my family and don't forget to take my iron pills (More like 3 and I was out of iron for several days)

My healthy pregnancy intentions for this week:

1) Midwifery appointment on Wednesday

2) Keep reading Bradley book and do Bradley exercises 4 days this week

3) Do one practice relaxation exercise with Jacob from Bradley book

4) Finish up the requirements of my La Leche League Leader certification