Saturday, September 15, 2012

On the precipice...

The last two weeks since the hurricane have seemed pretty sustainable, like I'm getting the hang of having two children.  Naturally, right when I've gotten to that point, it's time to go back to work.  I start on Monday and will be working part time (20 hours.)  On the one hand, the schedule (Mon, Tues, and Thurs till the early afternoon) seems quite manageable.  On the other hand, I know it's going to make it a lot harder to feel on top of things.

My mom is coming for the first two weeks to help out which is priceless!  It's not that I don't want to go back to work so much that I don't want to leave my little baby!   So having her here delays that part somewhat, since it's not hard to leave Cora with Grammy. 

So in a vacuum, sure I'd like to work, it just gets complicated when you add in my children meaning that I get to spend less time with them because of work.  There is the time taken by work but then it also feels like the remaining time gets crunched because all the rest of life has to happen in those hours.  And I'm not good at ignoring the "to-do's." 

Ahh, the leisurely activities of unstructured days

BUT, BUT, BUT, I realize I have a big luxury to be able to work part time.  I also know that I won't know whether I can do this well unless I give it a genuine effort, so I'm not even going to judge the situation until at least 6 weeks have gone by.  Hope I can stick to that!

It's a quick post today because I'm enjoying the slow pace of life right now even if I do think there is a precipice waiting for me on Monday!

We love our new swing set!

Cora says tummy time is for the birds.


Naomi said...

Great reflections - I love your blog!

julie holcomb said...

That is exactly how I felt when I went back to work in NC! I finally had a good routine, felt comfortable w my duties of daily life and w two kids. Then it all went downhill, and I can honestly say as Arlo turns 1 this week, I still feel like I'm hanging by a thread. But that's why mothers are so awesome. We give everything we have to our families (and jobs) and make it all work. Going to bed tonight w the playroom a disaster. Why? Because I work next three days and its going to be like that anyway, and no one is coming for an inspection. The only way to make it is to let go of some of those "to dos", and trust me, it ain't easy. Have fun w those sweet babies and give them a kiss from the Holcomb's.