Sunday, September 07, 2014

Exhaustion, dreams, and reality

10.5 weeks: 8/27/2015


It hasn't gone away yet!  I'm very much looking forward to getting some energy back.  Saturday's trip to the dentist and a birthday party had me collapsing on the couch for 3 hours, falling into a deep sleep, and leaving Jacob alone to deal with lunch and naps (which actually never happened... Cora!!!)

Today, (my first Wednesday off work with kids in school!) I had a productive surge and I cleaned up the house (you know the real cleaning when you actually organize rather than just tossing things into a basket) for the first time in two months.  When Jack and Cora spent a week in SC a few weeks back, I had visions of major house projects.  I spent most of my non-working time that week lying on my bed.  Not a single project accomplished.


Wow pregnancy dreams!  Can anyone else relate?  They are so vivid!  I've been having them from the very beginning of this pregnancy and I do remember them from past pregnancies.  You wake up to such clear memories of the dream.  And they are weird!  Sometimes disturbing, sometimes not.  This week I dreamed I gave birth to this baby, a girl.  That leads to my third point.


I've not been walking around anxious about this pregnancy (thank you horrible nausea and fatigue) but I've still not been thinking too concretely about an actual baby.  That has started to change.  Jacob and I heard the baby's heartbeat this week and that, combined with my birth dream, has helped make everything start to feel more real.  I have a name in mind for the little girl I think I'm carrying.  I have visions of what our spring will be like.  To me, the expectancy of the baby, birth, and the newborn period are such amazing periods and I'm so excited to think about experiencing them again.

At this point in the pregnancy, we'd already shared the news widely about Jack and Cora, but I'm keeping it close a few more weeks this time.  We're telling friends as it makes sense, but I don't feel quite ready to share far and wide.  I think that's the part of me that still can't believe this is our reality.

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